So, what are you, then? Are you a human? Perhaps you're a monkey. Or a gorilla. Maybe even a maths teacher. So, which are you? I, personally, label myself in public as a gorilla. Humans and monkeys are way too civilised to have me amongst their ranks. I wear jumpers with hoods, I wear jeans, I use the words "Shut up" in every other sentence, and I hate my teachers and most other adults. In most places, I am a gorilla. Here, in England, I am a "chav".
First of all - a "chav"? What? That's kinda stupid. EVERYONE knows chavs don't wear jeans. Er, maybe that isn't the best argument. Let's try again.
You can't class me as a chav, for the simple reason I intend to become a chav-exterminator when I'm older. I will have a Mckenzie-detecting rod which can vapourize most JJB and Sports World products within two point five seconds. Then I'll sweep the ashes of the contaminated clothing into a nuclear-protected dustpan and brush, and dump it into a secured nuclear fission ground to be safe.
Long story short - I'm not a chav and I hate them all. Don't refer to me as a chav. Or an emo. Or a goth. Or a punk. Or a gangster. Or anything. I don't need a label, I'm not a bloody desert from Tesco's or something. I'm a human being - or rather, a gorilla - who isn't requiring a tag above his head to indicate exactly what subspecies of gorilla he is.
Gorrilius Chavarius? I don't think so.
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